last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
