I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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