its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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