What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
