Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
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