she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Boobs are out for the taking
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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