I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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