The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
