4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you win again, gameday.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
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