I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
