You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
