Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
