some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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