I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
