So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
