I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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