He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
