too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize