Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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