A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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