I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
wow bdsm is so cute
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize