Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
