How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
