am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I don't want my vagina anymore.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
