His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
