But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
