So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
