bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
