I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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