Even the bartender felt bad for me
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
