honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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