what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
