i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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