i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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