So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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