pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
