I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
