Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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