He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
