Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
