I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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