He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
