I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Oh god it's open bar.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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