dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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