he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
