I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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