apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
