A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
