Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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