normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
